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How to Talk Dirty in Bed An Expert Guide to Dirty Talk

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Have a safe word or signal to let your partner know if they say something that makes you uncomfortable. Knowing you can stop at any time—no questions asked—makes trying new things less scary. The bedroom should always be a judgment-free zone, but that doesn’t make anyone invincible to embarrassment. Hiding you or your partner’s face behind a mask may help relieve shyness, or add an air of erotic mystery while dictating exactly what you want each other to do. Imagine saying, “I want to stimulate your mammary glands with my oral cavity.” It’s accurate—but far from sexy. Instead, try something like, “I want to lick your nipples until you’re leaking precum.”

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Make sure you check in with your partner (outside of the bedroom, when you aren’t being sexual with each other) to see if there’s any words that they want you to avoid during your dirty talk. It’s just as much work to carry the conversation in the bedroom as it is during a date, so keep the dirty talk flowing before, during, and after sex. Vocalizing your pleasure guides the action, and delivers fantasies straight from your dreams. Whether you’re role-playing or just adding color commentary to your sex life, dirty talk is a kind of performance.

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“Have clear conversations about what each of your boundaries, desires and comfort levels are and have agreed upon language and cues if things change during the dirty talk experience,” she adds. Again, start slow with your dirty talk and move into more aggressive forms of it only when the situation calls for more. Once you get a feel for the vibes, then it is up to you to choose how you wish to progress. The best dirty talk examples for starting out are those that maintain only a slight aura of sexuality to them that simply hint at the real thing, and are most effective when they aim to build anticipation. Yes, dirty talk can be a healthy addition to many relationships.

  • It takes you step by step with easy-to-follow instructions.
  • Talking dirty can make you both enjoy sex more.
  • Of course, you need to test these phrases out and see how your partner reacts.
  • So the next time you talk dirty to your man, make sure to speak slowly and clearly in a way that accentuates the meaning of the actual words.

What To Say If You Get Tongue-Tied During Phone Sex

What dirty talk isn’t is some mysterious language. While it might seem like something straight out of erotic literature or a steamy movie scene, it’s useful for elevating communication in the bedroom. After all, the brain is the biggest sex organ. Learning how to talk dirty without feeling like you’ve stepped into a cliché is an art, and your cheat sheet is below. Even if your bedroom banter has never been better, we can guarantee you’ll learn something new. As long as you and your partner enjoy trying out and using dirty talk together, there is no wrong way to go about it.

“Pick a sexy activity you already both like to do, for example oral sex or using vibrators, and give or take direction with simple words like faster/slower or harder/softer,” she says. This one stage is where dirty talking is the most powerful. Introducing it at this point will rocket the tension and anticipation sky high, and cruise at altitude for the rest of the session. The excitement you had from the first handful of times you had sex will often rush back in and rekindle your passionate fires. Sometimes it can be difficult figuring out what you want to say next when you’re learning how to dirty talk. If you remember to go through your senses, that’s made a lot easier.

Unless he has insane goofball rizz, it might not land right. Once you’ve done that, use these lines to get started. The start of a conversation is also a good time to exchange any no-fly trigger words. We also use different external services like Google Webfonts, Google Maps and external Video providers. Since these providers may collect personal data like your IP address we allow you to block them here.

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